Tuesday, October 7, 2008

A Letter to Mr. Hall


Dear Bob Hall @ The Daily Duffy,
Hey guy. Whats up, buddy? I just wanted to say I think you're a really sweet spy, and I totally believed you were that gay douche Tom Cruise for a while. Sweet spying dude! (Also, incase Tom Cruise is an even better spy than he is an actor and he is now pretending to be Bob Hall pretending to be Tom Cruise before, then:
Hey bro,
I still dig you're wife's boobs, they really, really, really are sweet, but I'm pretty sure you are gay so you probably don't dig them as much as I do since they are not cock and all. Don't worry guy, I'll dig them enough for the both of us. Any way, that Bob Hall is a pretty shitty spy, huh? Yeah, fuck him. So yeah, gotta run, give your wife's left one (or Bridgett, as I call it) a little tweak for me but maybe don't make any more kids cause I think that might be a bad call for our society (unless your unborn son is going to star in the sweet-ass version of Top Gun 2, cause that would be rad).
Chillin' like Bob Dylan,
Killin' like penicillin,
Tyler Howard Brown
So Bob, what spy school did you go to, and as an alum, do you have any pull, maybe hook a brother up? Cause I would love to be able to spy like you. Maybe an internship or some shit? How bout starting me on some local tester mission, like swiping some paper's off Gavin Newsom's desk or some shit. I think I could handle that, I don't think that shitstain has any secret service or anything, so I'd be cool. Also Bob, have you seen this movie "The Gift?" Oh man, there is this one part where Katie Holmes totally shows her cans and that is a really good scene in that movie. Probably the best scene in that movie, and its a really good movie cause of that scene. Any way, rent it or get it on On-Demand or some shit and pause that part for a bit. So yeah, and any help on the spy tip would be sweet too, and I hope the gonorrhea you got from raping that chicken in Tijuana has cleared up. That shit looked like it must have itched like fuck.

Peace in the Middle East,
and stay black and on the attack.
Tyler "T-Bone" Brown

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Dear Fartfuck,
For one thing a spy of Bobs caliber would never tell you any real specifics about his spying. That would be un spy-like. And as for the chickens. Maybe he had to cause he was way under cover.

Lyle Gorch said...

Tyler,

I'm glad I found you cause I been thinking bout you all day. i didn't even leave my trailer that's in my Dad's backyard cause I so wrapped up in it.

Why do you keep fucking with Mr. Hall?
What the fuck is your problem, fag? (I saw you live in San FranSISSYco, so I knows you a cockgobillin' queer. Our new President Sarah Palin said all Fags live in San Fran.)
Mr. Hall don't have time for your bullshit, even if he a real spy or not.
Have you ever thought that maybe he's the one fucking with you?

Well, have ya fag?

Fuck you.

-Lyle

P.S. I think Tom Cruise is gay to. And I like his wife's titties. They pretty. So maybe you not that bad.
I don't know.