Tuesday, September 1, 2009

I'm in a gang.

Yeah so I just joined a gang, and damn does it feel good to be in a gang! Joining a gang was something I never really thought I would do, what with the initiation murders and all, but joining this one was SOOOOOO easy, I just asked my buddy James if I could be in and he said sure. Some of my high school friends and I almost started a gang back at the prep school in Connecticut we went too, but it never really panned out. We were gonna be called "Los Blancos." So the gang I am in now is called "The Latin Bloodcrip Kings" which is sweet cause our name naturally affiliates us with all the major gangs on the east and west coasts so we are welcome on pretty much everybody's turf. These affiliations are also gonna come in handy when we have to defend our own turf cause we don't have any guns or sharp knives yet. What's also cool is that everybody in our gang has jobs so we don't have to rob, murder and steal to get by, but you best believe we could if we needed to!
Our gang colors are purple with yellow. Here is an example of one of the bandanas you might see us wearing:
That bandana is also sweet cause we call women, "Squirrels", so yeah, super sweet bandana, dawg. God you guys, being in a gang is so super awesome! I now feel complete.
So we have a really sweet gang sign too, which is really important for every awesome gang to have. Here it is:
I think it really illustrates just how bad ass we are as a gang, cause what's more bad ass than a five horned, seven eyed goat-man on a cross? Fucking nothing, thats what, bitches. And instead of doing that stupid hand
sign gang shit, we are just gonna
carry around pictures of this guy and flash them at people, and then they will know not to mess with the Latin Bloodcrip Kings cause they must be a really tough, bad ass gang that would prolly really mess you up if you even so much as look at them the wrong way, sucka! Shit, why didn't I join a gang sooner!?!?!?
So right now its just me and James in the gang but I bet if you ask us, we'll prolly let you in the gang as long as you are pretty much as bad ass as we are. Also, you need to be employed cause we don't like having our fellow gang members mooching off us when we go out to the club to holla at all the fine squirrels, boyee.
Thug Life.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

I think you guys should seriously reconsider changing your gang name to, I'm a bit worried about your safety. I'm not sure the type of research you did when trying to incorporate all gang affiliations, but it feels nothing short of piss poor. Any episode of "gangland" on the history channel will clearly illustrate, gangs like the "bulldogs" "vice lords" or "18th street" are massively large and viciously dangerous, but clearly neglected in your naming convention. I don't think you're safe -- it's almost like you and your buddy James curled up on the couch together on foggy sunday afternoon and watched "colors". But Who am I to make the call if you guys want to be the Latin-Ball-Licking-Blood-King-Disciples, its America. Good luck and Safe Gangstering.

Anonymous said...

damn ima have to slap you. MS13, Sur13, Norte14, 18th st, Hoover Criminals, all dem beef with all 3 of the gangs in your gang name. and i know u sed it as a joke but you shuld name your gang
"The Latin PiruBloodNeiborhoodCripHooverCriminalViceLordAryanBrotherhoodMS13Sur13Norte1418thSt Kings" and i know i left out some gangs so you still wouldnt be safe cuz theres a 90% chance the gang i left out is beefin wit a gang in your name. and i know ur jokin so am i.

Anonymous said...

Well I can tell one thing about you, your not in gang. Gangs are true brothers, not some game for you to brag about to your buddies. Legit gangs don't automaticly assume they have territory. And you don't tell people that your willing to kill, because a brick could meet your head. Yea, your gang sign and your name make you sound like wannabe college kids who don't know what it's like to go to sleep in ditch starving cause that's your only option. Grow up and shut up! Yea you gonna get mad reading this and you probaly gonna say "well I'ma find you" say that and I'll give you my address. Just so you can come by and see what a real gang is like,

Tyler H Brown said...

Nope, actually I'm not "in gang," and I'm going to say "wow, I can't believe you didn't realize this is a comedy blog." Thanks for offering your address, but I'm going to pass. I'm glad to hear you are no longer starving in a ditch and can now afford to spend your free time reading on the internets. Have a lovely evening!

Anonymous said...

ok wtf a im from the st's whats wrong with that leba and fuck u homie stl sur trece west side menlo park

Anonymous said...

fuck sur trucha jotos itz all about weside barrio hollywood
stlkilla where gona get u back for taking menlo park SURR RATTSSSSS
from peuk

Anonymous said...

fuck u peuk diz is big payaso meber im the one who put the bulletz in ur legz so fuck u ese tipe agen and ill go split u holmes

Anonymous said...

Give me your address keyboard warrior, I bet you would be the biggest packet of undies. Suck a bag of dicks you faggot